Nerves

Well emotions hit me as I was waiting to go through security :) haven't really cried or shook like that. So happy. This is it! It's really really exciting!!!!!!!
I love you little girl!!!

Top of the hill

Well here we are - at the top of the hill for the roller coaster about to go really fast and make my stomach do flips!!!! I am 14 hours away from starting my journey to China for the second time. Taeya I am so happy that I 'accidentally' opened the email with your picture in it back in January. I am even more shocked and happy that the same day I opened that email your new Baba said that we should go back to China and adopt again. Your picture pulled me in and I couldn't stop looking at your face. Now you are pulling me to you so that I can be the mommy you have dreamed of. I can only hope that I can live up to the honor of being your Muchin. I keep looking at our bags and think how they will be in China in a matter of hours. Then in a matter of days you will be wearing the clothing that I and many others have picked out for you.

I am fully aware of the irony of wanting to get to you but never wanting this anticipation to end. It's like eating cheesecake... It's so delicious and even if you eat it slowly you will eventually run out. Then I can just savor the memory of how intense this wait is for you.

I love you Taeya. I'm coming - ready or not

Muchin

48 hours!!!!!!

I cannot believe that I am only 48 hours away from starting to get to China!!!! I will be to you my love in ONE WEEK!!!! In one week you will have the mommy that has tried like the dickens to learn Chinese. You will have the mommy that thinks your smile should be on the front page of every paper. You will have the mommy that dreams of what it will feel like to have you reach for my hand for the first time. I look at Braelin and see this little girl that was once a tiny little baby. I look at her and I can still see the room where she was placed in my arms for the first time. I wonder what is going on right now in the room that I will meet you in in one week. Is there another family in there starting out with their new daughter or son? I wonder about what you are doing right now. Are you playing with new friends at the swi wondering still what is about to happen? I promise I'll do everything I can to try and ease your pain lovey. I will try and show you that I WANT you and will never abandon you... I love you so much. I can't believe that the time is so near. We set a place for you at the dinner table last night :) Braelin's idea. It was our last dinner as a family of four... The next time we have a meal as a family at that table you will be there with us <3 (BTW I hope you like cereal and ramen noodles :) I'm a terrible cook!!!!!) Your gege and jiejie are going to grammy and grumpas house today. I leave in just 48 hours from now. I'll be on a plane right now in two days on my way to NYC and then Beijing!!!!! I am so excited to finally get you!!!!!!!

Love

Muchin

Gumdrops and lollipops

Not sure if I'll be able to use this or I'll have to use another way of getting pics to family and friends watching along our trip to china - so here is plan b Gumdropsandlollipops@yahoogroups.comOrhttp://groups.yahoo.com/group/Gumdropsandlollipops/Or send me your email address if I haven't sent you an invite and you want to follow along <3Love Brandi

In-China Itinerary for the Kuhn Family 

11/23 Arrive Beijing with CA982 at 6:20pm.

Your guide Cindy Lee or George Jiao will meet you at the airport and escort you to the Qianmen Jianguo Hotel.

11/24 Sightseeing in Beijing: Tiananmen Square, Forbidden City, Beihai Park, Hutong tour. 

11/25 Sightseeing in Beijing: Great Wall, Mutianyu Section. 

11/26 Free day 

11/27 Meet and take custody of the child at the orphanage.

11/28 Go to the Civil Affairs Office for adoption paperwork.

11/29 Sightseeing

11/30 Apply for the child’s Chinese passport. 

12/1 Sightseeing 

12/2 Go to Guangzhou with CA1339 (12:00pm-3:10pm). Your guide Elsie Chen OR Sarah Gao will meet you at the airport and escort you to the Garden Hotel.

12/3 Child’s visa medical examination, including the TB test.

12/4 Sightseeing in Guangzhou.

12/5 Return to the medical clinic for TB test result. Pick up child’s Chinese passport. Prepare documents for the visa interview with the guide’s assistance.

12/6 Visa interview and oath ceremony at the American Consulate at 10:00 a.m. 

12/7 Pick up child’s visa in the afternoon. 

12/8 Fly to Beijing with CA1310 (8:30am-11:30am).

Arrival in Syracuse 8:55pm!!!!!!!  

Travel Stuff

Travel Info!!!
Flying out!!!  
Tuesday Nov 22 5:50am
(will be in NYC until 3:50pm)
Arrival in Beijing
Weds Nov 23 6:20pm(China time)
Staying at Red Wall Garden Hotel
Touring Beijing Nov 24-26
GOTCHA DAY Nov 27th!!!
Flying to Guangzhou
Dec 2nd
Staying at the Victory in GZ until Dec 8th
FLYING HOME
Dec 8th 8:30am(China time)
then in Syracuse by
Dec 8th 8:59pm(Syracuse time)
FAMILY DAY!!

Now I remember

OH yeaaaaaaaaah that's right!!!  I remember how this works now!!!!  I don't sleep for about a month.  Until the jet lag from the flight home is gone sleep will only come in short bursts.  It's like christmas EVERY DAY for a month!!!!!  This is when I wrote most to Braelin in her journal and here I am writing to you in yours at the beginning of a very wonderful journey for you.  I just remember in China after gotcha day I would just sleep about 4 hours or so and then I would sit awake in the doorway almost of the hotel room on the floor.  Just listening to your sister sleeping and writing postcards to your brother.  Good times.  Good times.  Now I will have SOOOOOO many gadgets for those moments!!!!  I'll be able to keep up with the blogging for our family and I can even spend time on Skype talking to the kids in the middle of the night in China because it's the daytime here!!!!  Oh I just can't wait!!!!!!
I can't wait to see the sparkle in your eyes!!!  I can't wait to hear your voice as you and I try to communicate with each other!!!!
Well I'm off to look for what hotel I want us to stay at in Beijing!!!!
Love
Muchin

Cloud 9

I feel like I am in a dream right now.  We got the travel approval!!!!!!  I am so elated I can't even put words to this!!!!  I get to dream about you and know that there is a date to go with it.  I can think about you and know when I get to kiss your cheek.  I can plan my flight to you.  I can plan what I can take pictures of in Beijing for you.  I can plan on what to bring you in your little back pack.  I can plan your Christmas for you!!!  I can think about having three children in our home for Christmas!!!!!  I can think about the wonderful warm holiday meal that we will all have together on Christmas day.  I can...  period plain and simple I can now...  I am just so happy.
Honestly I've waited so long for this moment that I'm trying not to think about what this means to you.  But I would be doing you a great injustice if I don't give honor to what this means to you.  Tomorrow they will probably come to you in your foster home that you have known since you were three and they will take you from there and without telling you what they know. They will place you in an orphanage that you will have no memory of being in three years earlier.  I just wish that they would tell you what they know.  That we have worked doggedly to get to you since falling in love with you in January.  I can only pray that they won't tell you that your foster family doesn't love you so that they can feel justified in doing it this way.  I can only pray that they won't say things to you so that they can feel better about your grieving.  I can only pray that when you and I meet that you will feel how much love we have for you and that I want to do everything I can to be the mommy that you dream of.  I will never hurt you.  I will always love you.  I cannot remember a time when I didn't have you in my heart.  
The tears come freely now.  I don't have to hold on anymore so that i can hold out till the end. It's the end of the paperchase.  WE ARE ALL YOURS!!!!  I will be to you in a matter of two weeks.  Whatever pain and tears you will feel over the next two weeks I will do all I can to try and help them eventually go away.  I will do all I can to make you the happiest little girl in the world...
I love you so much
Dear SiYu....
Love
Muchin

Due date past due

I keep thinking that this part is like a pregnancy due date.  We are aware that you are due to us any day.  We know that we have no control over this part.  We know that we wanted to get you yesterday but that didn't happen so we will just have to do...  Our TA is like the water breaking and we will know that you will be coming sooner than later.  Without the TA we just walk around eating spicy food, jumping up and down all just trying to get you to get things started :)  Then come the contractions and the pain - the 20 hour flight and the 36 hour day of traveling.  Finally we are almost there!!!!  Just one more push through this last bit of the painful wait.  Then the door opens and you walk through.  Everything complete.  Pain over.  It will be like we were never without you.  All the waiting will melt away each time I kiss your cheek.  But for now - we are past our due date and we want you yesterday... and every minute without you is agony.